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im only accepting mail with this stamp on it from now on
can we skip school and university and go to the part where i become a princess
i like how when people say “i love couples with size difference” they mean tiny girls with waists so thin the large men they are dating can put their entire hand around them and by love i mean where the FUCK are my tiny vain princes and their huge muscular knight women who don’t put up with any of their shit and hoist them over their shoulders and walk off when they’re having a princely temper tantrum your all WEAK
"My Girl’s Pussy", Harry Roy & His Orchestra, (1931)
If anybody ever tells you that there was no sex in the ’20s or ’30s or ’40s, you show them this and laugh in their face.
And YES, it means exactly what you think it means.
Oh my god I forgot I posted this fucking song it’s hilarious
It’s really catchy too…
Simon: *standing in front of mirror, looking at self*
Simon: *squishes fat blue belly*
Simon: I hope Marceline doesn’t notice that I’ve gained weight
Marceline: *walks into room*
Marceline: Damn Simon u fat
those damn kids and their walkman cd players and windows 95 computers
I was sitting on sea ice when I heard a little peep over my shoulder.